Sigh

Sigh...what a long day at work. Today it was beyond miserable. I did the work of two managers for $2.00 an hour. My lunch consisted of one chicken finger and a handful of fries-pretty much shoved into my mouth all together while I ran up and down the line in the kitchen traying up food and taking To Go orders. When it was my turn to be busy on the floor, everyone else had completely disappeared. Typical.

Sigh...and sniffle. It's been a terrible day, but mom remembered that I requested spaghetti and meatballs for dinner. So I cry. The shower seems like a good refuge, so I escape for thirty minutes with an audio book and the hot steam. And cry some more. No use keeping it in.

Sigh...relax the vocal chords. Tonight begins tech week for my show, which opens on Friday. A twenty minute warmup begins the healing process. The familiar exercises ease much of the tension I feel. My voice finds its center, and so do I.

Sigh...a breath of relief. Rehearsal goes off without a (major) hitch. All the energy I was putting into being miserable I channel into a focused (more or less) performance. It's not perfect, but it's good, so I'll take it. Plus, I get to spend three hours with very charming, funny, talented people whom I like a great deal. They seem to like me, too, which is always a bonus. I thank my lucky stars that I have such an outlet for my emotions.

Sigh...the day is finally over. One more Monday down. One more miserable day at work over. It occurs to me that for at least a month now my Mondays have been wretched, but the closer I get to Friday the lighter my heart is. I don't like being that way. I miss liking my job. I miss enjoying what I do on a daily basis, rather than counting the hours until I'm free of that prison.

Sigh...and try again tomorrow.